Leaving Pain Behind and Moving On

A Guest Blog by Heather Edwards. Lingering resentment from things that have gone wrong is hard to shake. Whether it’s the result of a bad break up or a job loss, it’s best to find some resolution. It would be wonderful if we all got exactly what we wanted, and when we wanted it.  But, the hard truth is that good things often take a lot of time and usually a few set backs along the way. Once you’ve made a strong commitment and things still don’t work out, how do you pick up … [Read more...]

Funerals, Psychology and Cost

Most people know something about death and dying thanks to Elizabeth Kubler-Ross and others. We know about the stages of grief, including denial, anger, depression and acceptance. We know about guilt and that deep feeling of loss. But, how much do we talk about the psychology of burying your loved one? I am not talking about the ceremony, of burial or cremation. I am talking about the business of your local funeral home.   Loss & Emotions: Here's the scene. You just lost … [Read more...]

The Mind of a Shopaholic: Oniomania

Oniomania is a strange name for a common problem: Shopaholism Here's Dr. Hindie Klein's take on it. The Mind of a Shopaholic: Some people shop themselves into an addiction. An alcoholic can give up booze, a gambler can give up on Las Vegas, but you have to shop. This is what makes Oniomania such a pernicious disorder. One day you look at your closet, and it’s filled with endless stuff, or you’re in debt, or you’ve stolen money to satisfy your habit. Do you buy things you … [Read more...]

The Borderline/Narcissistic Mother

Are you the child of a Borderline or Narcissistic mother? Not sure?   It is a complicated topic, and while there's overlap, this guest blog by Daniel Lobel PhD may help you to tell the difference.   Self Centered Nurture: Children of mothers with Borderline and Narcissistic Disorders are likely to have suffered some form of emotional abuse; however, each type of pathology leaves its own unique imprint on the development of the child and the parent-child … [Read more...]

The Narcissistic Boss

Narcissism in the Workplace: You probably wonder why your boss seems to give you such a hard time. He builds you up, only to tear you down. She sees the bad and not the good. He makes you anxious and worried. Do any of these behaviors make a person a narcissistic boss? Hardly. Taken from a manager's perspective, dealing with people is demanding. Your work reflects upon her and not just on you. Sometimes he will build you up, but he can't always be Mr. Nice Guy. Some … [Read more...]

Sibling Rivalry & The New Baby

This Guest Blog is by Hindie M. Klein. --------------------------------------- A new child changes your life. And, if you already have a child, it changes his or her life as well – forever. Nowadays, many people live wonderful lives without children. They define life through their relationships, their careers, their nieces and nephews, their students, their patients, etc. There are so many ways to touch the next generation. A New Baby Changes Your Life: But, for … [Read more...]

Old & Happy – The Secret Formula

What do we do when the mountains to climb are inside of us? Research seems to support that many of us acutally get happier as we age. It's not surprising, because we've had decades of perspective on life, despite all its hardships. Yes, we have aches and pains. And, yes, we've had divorces, money, family or health issues, but the way we look at life can truly be transformative. As we age, it may be time to forgive, let go and wake up to the mystery of our lives. This short piece is a … [Read more...]

God, “Why Have You Made Me Your Target”? (Job 7:20)

Why do good people suffer? Is it a punishment?  Or, is there something terribly wrong with this idea? An ancient text called The Book of Job  has a worthwhile take on your suffering. It's message is modern, brilliant and on the money. Job's story may help you a lot. Suffering as Punishment: “You get what you deserve” is a universal belief that stands the test of time. Many hold that those who suffer trauma, trials and tribulation are being punished for some wrongdoing. … [Read more...]

Making Your Own Luck

Why is it that some people seem to have all the luck? Casie has the best boyfriends. They treat her well and aren’t high maintenance. While not everyone works out, it’s as if Casie simply flows onto the next one. Or she’s happy being single. You, on the other hand, can’t seem to find someone when you want to, and get trapped in difficult entanglements. It’s not right. Jack’s looking for a job. It seems that whenever he wants one, something appears. You, on the other hand, … [Read more...]

The Influence of a Narcissistic Father

“Half the harm that is done in this world is due to people who want to feel important. They don’t mean to do harm, but the harm (that they cause) does not interest them. Or they do not see it, or they justify it because they are absorbed in the endless struggle to think well of themselves”. ~ T.S. Eliot You used to think that by the time you were in your twenties and definitely by your thirties you’d have your act together – you’d be establishing a successful career, have your own … [Read more...]